Memories
by Luliyah
Summary: Jinguji Ren is marrying his soul mate at 23. But what about the years that lead up to this moment. His memories... the good... and the bad. (JingujixHijirikawa / RenxMasato)
1. Chapter 1

The church had began to fill as I fixed my tie and suit in the mirror. As much as I hated to admit it I was nervous. Really nervous. I only wanted to have to do this once because I had found the only person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

My father entered my room to tell me it was time to stand at the top of the aisle. He congratulated me without a smile but as he left the room I saw the corner of his mouth twitch up in a slight smile. My father didn't approve of it but he was happy for me nonetheless.

I breathed deeply, closing my eyes, before I left the room.

The church was packed with family members and friends and I smiled at a few who met my eye. I rung my hands together as everyone stood up. I was nervous as the music started up and the large back door opened. The walk up to the aisle was slow enough for me to remember everything...

* * *

 **Hey minna!**

 **Just a heads up on how the story will be set out. Everything will be from Jinguji Ren's point of view and each chapter will be a different memory. This means chapter lengths may vary dependent on the type of memory. Anyway hope you enjoy. Luliyah x**


	2. Chapter 2

"Masato, this is Ren. I'd like you two to play nicely together whilst your father and I speak," my father said as he gently pushed me towards the blue haired boy.

I didn't like the look of him and I could tell that he didn't like the look of me either. But he smiled at my father as if to say yes and the two adults left us alone in the room.

"Why are you hear?" I asked turning away from the boy.

"My father has business with your father," he answered monotonously.

"How old are you?" I asked looking back at him.

"Seven; the same age as you," I scowled at his response.

"Whatever. Nice to meet you, I suppose," I said and stuck my hand out reluctantly.

"Nice to meet you," he replied shaking my hand awkwardly.

I pulled my hand away quickly and the blue haired boy shrank back slightly.

"How long will our father be here?" I asked.

"An hour or so," he answered.

I turned away from him and began walking towards the garden door. I was stopped by Masato pulling on my sleeve.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

I yanked my arm away from him as I continued walking towards the door. As I reached for the latch, I heard him whimper.

"Don't leave," Masato mumbled as tears began to form in his eyes.

I couldn't look at him; he was just so helpless. I pushed the door open and stepping into the garden extended my hand towards him. He looked at me, confused by my sudden gesture. I smiled at him and he wiped the tears from his eyes. Masato began making his way towards me and took my hand as he stepped into the garden.


	3. Chapter 3

"It was nice of you to come round," he said showing me into his room.

I remember it being nothing like a seven year old's room should be. His walls were white but had no drawings or paintings lining them. He had a large desk in the corner of his room and a small bookshelf in the other. I wondered over to the bookshelf. The shelves were lined with book like the ones my father had in his study; no story or picture books.

"Do you read all these books?" I asked.

Masato beamed, "My father got me the books, they're some of his favorites."

Masato pulled me away from the bookshelf showing me round a bend to the rest of his bedroom. It wasn't much. Just a single bed, pushed up against the wall near a window; and a low table with a few cushions beside it.

"Do you spend much time in your room?" I asked.

He pulled me down to sit with me on the cushions before letting go of my hand.

He nodded slowly, "Father doesn't like me going around the house without supervision; says I'll be trouble."

"So all you do is stay in here, by yourself?!"

"Well, not necessarily... sometimes me and Haruka play in the garden or in her room... and sometimes father lets us go in the front room to read," he answered.

"Whose Haruka?" I asked.

"My sister. She's living with my grandmother for now so I don't see her as often as I used to. Next time you're both here at the same time I'll introduce you," he said smiling.

I smiled back, "That'll be nice. So now that she's not around, are you alone a lot?!"

"Yes," he smiled sadly. "But you get used to it."

He looked up towards the window above his bed. The sunlight seeping through the glass hit his face, blinding him momentarily. Masato turned away from the ray of sun; smiling at me.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey Ren," he whispered.

The cupboard we were hid in was quite small and when he spoke his breath tickled my neck.

"What?!" I replied, my voice quiet.

"What is it like?" he asked.

The cupboard was dimly lit as besides the fact that it held bedding my family had no reason for it. Even still, I could tell that as he spoke he wasn't looking at me.

"What is what like?" I asked.

"What is it like to kiss someone?" he asked, blushing slightly.

I chuckled as I watched him turn his head away. It was funny to think that at the age of fourteen he still hadn't kissed anybody. It was also kind of cute...

"You really want to know?!" I teased.

He nodded his head without looking at me. I fumbled around and grabbing his waist pulled him as close to me as I could.

"R-ren!" he stuttered, desperately trying to keep his voice down. "W-what are you d-doing?!"

From that close, I could feel the heat of his cheeks as I tilted my head towards his.

"Close your eyes," I whispered. "And put your arms round my neck."

Reluctantly, he did what he was told and I pulled him closer still, my arms wrapping more comfortably around his waist. I leaned my head forward and kissed him, gently. I felt him wrap a few strands of my hair around his fingers as the kiss continued. I pulled away slightly and whispered his name: "Masato."


	5. Chapter 5

What must have been grass brushed against my leg as he pulled me along after him.

"Don't look," he warned as he came to a stop.

"Okay, open your eyes," he said.

I opened my eyes. Surrounding us were thousands of plants in a large green house. In the center there was a grand piano and Masato sat down gesturing for me to sit down next to him.

"This is where I come to play. My father doesn't like my playing, says it's bothersome," he said looking down at his lap.

"You don't listen to him do you?!" I asked, worried that he was being suppressed by his father.

"I don't play in the house but this is my grandmother's greenhouse and she lets me play here. Tells me not to listen to my father," he answered.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"For what?!" he asked turning to look at me.

"Sharing this with me," I leaned over, kissing him on the cheek and he blushed.

"C-can I play you something?" he asked his face a bright red.

"Sure."


	6. Chapter 6

"What are you looking for?" he asked hovering behind me.

I rummaged deeper into the trunk until my hand fixed around a leather covered book. I pulled it out satisfied with my findings.

"Here," I said handing it to Masato.

He studied the book, running his hands over it and turning it over and over.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Open it," I replied, stepping back to lean against the wall.

He slowly opened the book and began to flick through it's pages.

"This is..." he began.

"Our memories," I finished. "Look at the date."

"2006. Four years ago. Ren, we were twelve back then," he said as he pawed over the pages.

"I know. Seems like another place all together."

He nodded as he continued to flick through the pages.


	7. Chapter 7

I lifted him higher onto my lap as I kissed his bare chest. A small moan escaped his lips as I began to suck on the skin near his collar bone.

"Ren," my name came out muffled as he bit down on his lip.

My hands slipped round his waist, pulling him into me. I planted kisses down his arm as he clung to me tightly. He buried his head into my shoulder as I eased my first finger inside of him.

"Does it hurt?" I asked and he shook his head.

I moved my finger in and out, slowly at first but then picking up the pace as I inserted as second finger. I could feel him tightening around my fingers as they massaged his sensitive spot.

"Ren," he moaned, finally looking up at me.

His face was flushed and I leaned forward to kiss him softly.

"Ren, I can't take it," he whimpered. "Put it in."

"Are you sure?" I asked easing my fingers into him one last time.

"I'm sure."

I kissed him again; my tongue slipped into his mouth making him moan all the more.

I lifted him up slowly before easing him onto me. He clenched his eyes shut, his brow furrowing in pain. I winced. No matter how much I wanted this I had to be considerate of Masato; I didn't want to hurt him. I lowered him onto me and heard a muffled whimper.

His fingers were curled around my hair and pulled on them as he bit him lip. I eased him up off of me and brought him to sit on my lap. He opened his eyes; there were pools of tears forming in the corners. I pulled him into a hug. I kissed his shoulder softly as I felt his arms tighten around me.

"It's okay, we have plenty of time for this. We don't have to do it tonight," I whispered.

He shook his head slowly, "I'm sorry Ren. I wanted to do one thing for you; but it turns out I couldn't."

I pulled away from him enough to see his face.

"Don't say that," I said before kissing his lips.

"You've done more than enough."


	8. Chapter 8

"I didn't do anything wrong!" I shouted slamming his bedroom door shut behind the both of us.

"You took my sister to the green house," he said, somehow managing to stay composed.

"And what!? You aren't the only one who isn't allowed to play! Haruka told me she needed somewhere to play away from your father. So I took her there. I don't understand why you're so angry," I said, my voice softening slightly at the end.

He turned to face me.

"I'm not angry, I'm upset. That was my special place and I shared it with you. I wanted you to see some other part of me than what I'm forced to act like."

He was shaking as he said that and turned back to looking out his window. I hugged him from behind, kissing his shoulder gently.

"Don't do that when I know it's Haruka you want to be with," he whispered.

"Masato," I mumbled letting go of him.

"You can leave. It hurts more the fact that you're still here even though you don't want to be."

I turned and left him there staring out of his window.

I ran down the stair desperately wanting to get out of that house; I'd hurt the most important person to me but I hadn't realised. I bumped into something as I came to the bottom of the stairs and stumbled backwards.

"Ren! What's wrong?!" Haruka cried rather alarmed.

"Sorry Haruka," I muttered trying to pass to her left but she blocked my way. "Please! I need to leave!"

"Something happened with Masato-kun didn't it?!" she sighed.

She instructed me to sit down as she began mulling around the kitchen.

"Speak," she instructed turning her back to me.

So I told her everything.

"You have to apologise," she said as she scooted the plate over to my side of the table. "I will as well."

"Do you think I was wrong to take you there?!" I asked taking a bite out of the sandwich she'd made me.

"Yes," she answered taking a seat next to me. "That was the only place he was able to be himself. He obviously cared enough about you to show you. So you should have let it remain his instead of showing it to me. That's something you'll never be able to give back to him."

"You're right. But what am I meant to say?!"

"You'll know," she said smiling at me.


	9. Chapter 9

That day that we had fought; I had't talked to him at all the following week. It was a strange feeling not having him by my side. It was like I'd lost part of myself; and truthfully I had.

I had to walk past him frequently in the school halls; but whenever I passed him he'd look away. Finally, I'd come to my limit.

"Masato," I said walking up to him as he stood by his locker.

"What do you want?" he sighed, shutting his locker and turning to me.

"To apologise," I answered.

"Don't apologise if you don't mean it," he said, his expression sad.

"Masato!" I whined, taking his hand. "I love you. I'm don't want Haruka I want you."

There were a few people in the hallway as we talked and Masato looked uncomfortable as a few heads turned towards us.

"Not here," Masato whispered trying to pull his hand away from mine.

I held his hand tighter; refusing to let go.

"REN!" he shouted ripping his hand away from mine.

I stepped back, alarmed by his outrage. He stormed away from me but I ran after him, calling his name.

He stopped and turned to face me.

"Enough, Ren," he said, his face pained. "You've had your fun now leave me alone."

I grabbed his arm and pulled him into a hug.

"Can you feel my heart?" I whispered wrapping my arms round his back and holding him tighter.

His arms stayed by his side; reluctant to embrace me but still not showing resistance.

"This is how I feel about you," I continued. "I know you are hurt but I'm sorry."

I felt his hands come to rest on my back and heard him sniffle.

"Do you really love me?!" he whispered.

"Yes."


	10. Chapter 10

_Masato's POV_

I sat still as the snow fell around us. I could feel the weight of Ren's head on my shoulder from when he'd drifted off earlier. I watched as the small flakes settled into his hair and melted on his face making him shiver slightly. When we'd come to sit outside we hadn't anticipated that it would drop to this kind of temperature. Ren had only come out in a t-shirt and at this point was shivering quite uncontrollably despite his sleeping state. I picked up one of his hands and brought them to rest on my stomach under my many layers of clothing. His hand was cold and caused me to jump slightly as it made contact with the warm skin on my stomach. I let his hand rest there as I carefully took off my top layer and draped it over him; careful not to disturb him. When his shivering lessened I pulled him closer to me and nestled my chin on the top of his head.

"I don't want to wake you Ren," I whispered. "But I wish you could see the snow. It's so beautiful."


End file.
